The Present

WALT: Write a narrative

Success Criteria

I know I will be successful when….

• The title is suitable for the text.

• The orientation tells who the story is about, and when and where the story happened.
• The complication describes a problem and explains what happened next.
• The resolution explains how the problem was solved.

In class we had to re-write a story about a boy opening a box that had a puppy with three legs in it. This is the original link: http://www.literacyshed.com/the-present.html

The present

One day I was on the Xbox and then my mum came with a box. I ignored her and kept playing.

Then she opened the curtains. Mum stopped. Just then the phone rang. Are you going to open it? "Oh", I replied. So I slowly opened it but before I even did a puppy jumped out. "Haha" I said but I saw he only had three legs. I was so mad I threw him away.

The puppy was acting very clumsy and found a bright red ball. I played with it. I looked at him for 4 seconds and played again so looked at him again. I saw him he looked really cute. So I turned off the Xbox and got my crutches and told mum that I will be outside. I got the red ball and the puppy followed me outside. I told mum I will be outside and so we played fetch all afternoon. I'm happy that I have someone like me because I was the only one who had a disabled leg, but now he's here with me.

By Ryleigh